Double secret probation?

In March, police in Ann Arbor, Mich., were called to the Pi Kappa Alpha fraternity at the University of Michigan after a female trespasser entered during the dinner hour and ignored repeated attempts to get her to leave (even though she merely sat down, removed her clothes and masturbated). Fraternity members said later they would throw out the two sofas she touched.

Dean Wormer was heard to comment, “What is the worst fraternity on this campus? This year, it's gonna be different. This year we'll grab the bull by the balls...and kick those punks off campus! There is a little-known codicil in the Constitution...which gives the Dean unlimited power to preserve order...in time of campus emergency. The time has come for someone to put his foot down. And that foot is me.”