Record Service, Lincoln Square Mall, the Saturday before Easter:Clerk 1 (observing someone quickly leaving the Mall with several items, assumed to be food trays, halfway hidden under a jacket): What’s Bob (Rising) doing?
Clerk 2 (reading, not looking up): Probably shopping for Easter dinner.
Clerk 1: Oh. (long pause) Hold on, does he still work at LSB?
Clerk 2: No. But he still gets “benefits,” if you know what I mean.
The next day, Clerk 1 joins his family at Jumer’s Castle Lodge for Easter brunch. The “Easter Bunny” takes great interest in Clerk 1’s table, returning more often than not to repeatedly give candy to Clerk 1 while mussing his hair and giving him hugs. Clerk 1’s family thinks the attention is great and snaps a photo of the two together. Clerk 1, not knowing who is in the costume, is somewhat uncomfortable. About the middle of the meal, the “Easter Bunny” returns and leans in close to Clerk 1’s ear:
Easter Bunny: Dude [name of Clerk 1’s band} rocks!
Clerk 1 (whispering in disbelief): Bob?!
Easter Bunny (cryptically): Yeah – I was just in the kitchen.
Clerk 1 (with all blood draining from his face, under his breath): I was afraid of that.
The Easter Bunny pats him on the head and leaves. Clerk 1 quickly recommends that his family finish what they have before them and adjourn to the family homestead for dessert.
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